Sunday, August 9, 2015

I'm still here...empty nesting now

I haven't been so good at writing here have I? I'm beeen better in my journals (I hope my kids find them after I'm dead and see a different me than they know).

Julie and Malakai have moved out (July 9th) and in with her friend Jessica and Jess' boyfriend Arkia (sp?). They live on 13 Goshen Street, Hartford, but Malakai can still go to school in Manchester because of his ADHD diagnosis. She'll bring him to our house in the morning, Lee will get him to school (only up the road) and he'll come home here after school, until she gets out of work. She's got a fulltime job at Rocky Hill Animal Hospital clinic. Hope everything works out for her.

It has been nice rearranging furniture and getting the house back to being our house again. It's like a have a new apartment! Yippee!!

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Sad times... and a piece of happy!

I'm gonna try and write more this year... maybe at least once a week.

We are working on finding care for my mom a couple of times a week, then alternating weekends with my siblings, since my sister and I have been staying with her 3-4 days a week (it's exhausting)...

My daughter Leslie-Anne came down from MA today. I wondered why as I usually see her every 2-3 months (and on holidays) and I just saw her on Thanksgiving, and Christmas eve/day. So for her to come down again so soon... hmmm.

Well, I knew something wasn't right the minute she came through the door. I asked how she was, and then quickly asked her is everything alright? She had that look on her face and was shaking her head, biting her lips and started to tear up... is it you and Scott (her husband)? She nodded .... "Oh honey, I'm so sorry...."

He apparently wants a divorce (not anyone else in the picture), things that have been bugging him for years and he hasn't said anything, just kept building up. He's let her know since Aug/Sept, and they've seen counseling, but the little things she can change (they were easy), but the other things (not mentioned and not asked about... maybe I will later) not so much. She said they seriously talked about getting a divorce about a week and a half ago. She's still taking it in... So sad and feel so bad for her. Wish I was closer.

The good news beyond all this, is she was made (soon to be announced) an attorney at her work. Not quite an associate, but 'on counsel', so she can get more money and will be able to do attorney work/billing. YIPPEE!!!! Finally.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Goodbye, Tigger

Yesterday we had to put down one of our kitties.... Eighteen years old, having kidney failure, lost 1/3 of his weight in the last two years. Anything they could do for the short time wouldn't prolong his life much or give it much quality. Not sure I like that 'we' can decide to end his life when God hasn't done that yet. Shouldn't be that way.

 They sent him home in a 'coffin' type cardboard box (not sealed) and I'm going through the remorse things. I should have looked at him one last time. But I didn't. Makes me think of the day my grandmother died (I was seventeen) and I wouldn't go to the wake (my dad was really upset), because I heard it was going to be an open casket. I'd remembered my mom saying how bloated my gram looked in the hospital and I didn't want to remember her that way. I regret that now. Sorry, Dad....

Hard to sleep last night (or is it still night?I awoke at 4am)...  Trying not to thing of all the things I should have done before we set the stone on the grave. Felt rushed (it was dark) and now I want to redo things.

I should have written his name on the box
March 4, 1997- Dec 15, 2014

Should have written a note to him since I didn't have a chance to say my goodbyes before I left the house. Tell him how much I'll miss his scratching up the walls, well, not really... carving his 'name' on the molding of our doors, yowling at night waking us up at 2am, dragging our socks/underwear/knit jerseys up from the cellar only to plop them along the hall and then yowl to alert us that he'd brought us 'presents' (must have been a frustrated mouser)- although I won't miss the fresh 'holes in the t-shirts' that this procedure caused. At least he's gotten out of the stages where he'd swipe at your ankles/face when you got too close. My mom used to shriek when he'd come bounding in to the bathroom as she entered it. Jumped on the toilet, then to the sink for a drink. You'd put the water on, just a slight dribble, then he'd take his good old time, prowling around the sink getting in JUST the right position to dip his head under the sink for his drink. Sometimes, I'd get too impatient and shut the dripping off before he got there. I guess I won't have to scold Lee for leaving the water dripping hours later. He never remembered to shut it off.

I should have put a pillow in the box for him to be comfortable (even though I know his spirit has gone up to heaven), put a few of his favorite things (at least a tinfoil ball) in the box, but I just didn't want to look at a dead cat unless I knew he looked like he was sleeping. And I really didn't want anyone else to have to check first either. I think Malakai was curious to see him in there. (Is he really in there?). I noticed he looked at the box as I held it, craning to see if he could see anything in the hole in the side (I think it was a carrying handle, but I didn't use it as such. I should have petted him one last time. Should have let Malakai write him a note. Or a heart. Or just drew a picture on the box, but the thought that Tigger was actually IN the box while we're writing on it would have skeeved me out. I told him I really would miss him, even though he could be a pain in the ass at times. Glad I got to tell Leslie. After all, it was her cat. I'm glad Lee dug a deep hole in the backyard, but wished it wasn't in front of the compost pile... maybe it should be off to the side near the fence. Really want to go out and re dig the hole, which really wasn't big enough and so the box was laying on an angle (now I really am not sure if he's comfy the way it's leaning- should have taken the time to widen the hole, but knew it was hard for Lee to dig it because of the roots in the ground, then we could have reset it. Flat. And he'd be comfortable. But that's emotion...I know in my head that he doesn't feel anything in there. His spirit is already gone...but the 'vessel' that God gives us to live on this earth with should be more respected. I'll have to write on the VT slate that we put on the dirt after we buried him. Maybe that's where we can put our messages to him.

I'll do better when Squeak goes.... I thought HE was the one to go this time. He'll be missing his brother, I'm sure. Even though he picked on Tigger enough. We always said we won't replace them when they go.

Maybe tomorrow I'll sleep better. And the next night. And we'll get used to having one cat, not two. Now we'll KNOW who is getting into mischief, or who's having issues we need to relay to a vet. Squeak, I think you're getting too old to get into much mischief, but maybe I'll be more lenient when you do...

Sometimes the hardest thing you can do is say goodbye.
Goodbye, Tiggs...

Monday, October 27, 2014

Twins are born to Emma and Jason Eaton

Momma Emma Eaton and Felix Michael Eaton, born Oct 27, 2014 at 2:50pm, 7 lbs, 1 oz, 19.5"
He was born with a diaphragmatic hernia, which means he had a tear in his diaphragm, and through the tear a loop of his intestines had migrated up into his chest and was cuddling with his lung. Lungs don't like to be cuddled.

Miss Phoebe Valerie Eaton, born same day, at 3:09pm, 6 lbs, 9 oz, 19" long.

Papa and Dad Eaton and the twins.

 Phoebe getting a change.


This is much better....(Phoebe)

Phoebe thinks her reputation as grouchy candy corn is unjust and wants mento clear the air by
Explaining a bit better.

See, when you've spent every second of your pre-life and life with the same person, and that person suddenly vanishes, it's tough to be chipper.

Thanks to a truly incredible nurse at Manchester who followed her gut in spite of being poo-pooed by the pediatric team, what could've been a very serious and dangerous birth defect was identified in Felix *before* it became a problem. He was transferred by ambulance to CCMC in Hartford and is in the NICU there. This afternoon he'll be undergoing surgery to correct the issue. He'll stay in hospital for a few weeks after as he recovers.

So if Little P sometimes looks a little grouchy, it's because she misses her brother. And her mama, who's spending a lot of time with her brother. But don't worry, she's really a very happy baby most of the time.

Pre-surgery photo
Oct 31st.....Felix's surgery went very well this afternoon and he's exceeding everyone's expectations already for recovery. We hope (and expect) to have him off the ventilator tomorrow and on the (long) road to recovery. This kiddo is an absolute star, he clearly just wants to get this over with and come home 

Oct 31, 2014-- We brought Phoebe up to see him this morning. They hung out for a little while anyway. Finn is soaking up all of his gramma's love and attention which has helped tremendously with keeping him happy. His teachers at school have also had several "special projects" he's worked on for the babies and that has been a huge help also.
Nov 2nd.... Comments of how it was noticed....Intermittent skin mottling, occasional hazy breath sounds in the left, intermittent abdominal breathing, a couple of other really small things. Nothing big enough or constant enough that anyone else put it together.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Quilt Blaster!

It's always nice when your husband says to 'bring your sewing machine in case it rains", when we're going on vacation for two weeks to Maine. Like I'm gonna argue??! NOT!!

I did, along with some projects. You know... those UFOs that you almost forgot you started and then found in a drawer or a box. I also have a baby shower quilt that needed to be done soon. This is the baby quilt, called "Jelly Belly Bucks". It was a buck a block challenge with a local quilt shop, where you buy the navy and white fabric strips, including thangles and instructions for a buck, then add one contrasting fabric (in my case it was the wacky jelly bean fabric. I had it pin-basted, and had the binding all set, so I set off machine quilting the individual blocks around certain parts of the HSTs. I meandered a curvy stitch along the light blue sashing, then added pink binding.

 The next project with I had all these blocks from a swap at my old guild.
  I decided to add yellow sashing with a navy blue fabric that had daisies in it, but used one daisy per square at the corners of the blocks.
 Then so it wouldn't get too yellow, I added a blue border. (I had all this fabric in a bag with the blocks, so I never had to shop for anything-- except I DID get some deals on fabric at Marden's in Ellsworth and Sanford, ME.
This is some of the fabric I got....these were all an additional 10% off.
 Some Christmasy type fabrics... very rich looking.
 Then I did have one more quilt to put together, I found these three fabrics for the backing and made a pieced backing. I used the purple as the main backing, put a tomato red stripe down the back and inserted some straggler blocks from the front's leftovers, then used aqua for the binding. I didn't have batting, so that's as far as it got.
 I did buy this just because I thought it was interesting.
 This autumn panel was adorable.
 then I got some Dr Suess fabric, and other fun fabrics, .... just because.
The last project was to connect the jar blocks together (we'd had them pinned to the back black fabric), and then I found the wood slat fabric, for the pantry shelves. This will be fun to finish (plan to work on it this weekend at a 6 hr event).
Very productive vacation.... kind of glad it rained/overcast for a few days.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Spring Cleaning!

Okay, I know it should be kept up and all, but I use the sewing room for various things...not alot, but it stores my 'gifts' before they are wrapped, mending. But if I don't get in there and clean, it can get out of hand. I sometimes think someone goes in there and moves things around. How do I know this? Well, I find things that I can't even remember working on, or things I don't want to finish (those are the things I donate to the quilting group,

This is the sight that I see when I enter....That old quilt on the floor is almost not worth bothering to 'repair', but I will be cause it was made by Lee's grandmother. The box on top needs to be returned to my church group's closets (done). I have several fabrics I need to cut strips from on the cutting table, and they will get done by the end of this weekend.... Second photo is the room a little more organized and clean


This is the actual sewing area, storage of projects, design wall, etc...


I have a few projects I'm not sure I'll be working on for a while, so I have organized my fabrics so well now that I have extra boxes to put them in (will get done this weekend.) This is also my gift-giving area (bag on floor on the right and the giant airplane on top of fabric- those will be gone in a week or two).
I still have the table on the back left to organize and the tv table (it's got fabric on it that needs a home), but that will be done. It's so much better than it was!!
This was the worse of the area, mending, strips cut but not put in the proper boxes. Now it's so much easier to work in.... Feeling so cleansed......